A Gift with Lasting Impact

*Warning: Possible Triggering Content*  This content may be triggering for some people. Proceed reading with caution.

If you need support in reference to domestic violence or sexual assault, contact our 24 hour hotline 631.666.8833.

 

Can you imagine, for a moment, a woman about to make the hardest decision of her life?

Her name is Emily and the choice she is making in the next two hours is life-changing. Emily just called our hotline.  She has called before and told our staff the reasons why she needs to end her marriage and all the reasons she simply cannot leave her husband of twelve years. Emily is unemployed, her car and the bank accounts are in her husband’s name.  And there are her children to think of. Our hotline staff has helped Emily consider ways to keep herself and her kids safe in their household.  For Example, Emily now tries to move out of the kitchen (where there are countless weapons) when the abuse escalates, her children know the safe word and when she says it they go into their room and lock the door.  Emily has made copies of important documents and has given them to a friend to keep safe.  Emily knows that L.I. Against Domestic Violence can help her find shelter, help her feed her children and find work.  But still, Emily has chosen to stay.

 

She stays because her husband has sworn that he will kill her if she leaves. 

She lives in fear that her children will grow up without their mother.

The last twelve years of marriage have not been all bad.  Emily still loves her husband.  She loves that he reads to her girls before bed and that he works a second job so that they can attend private school.  Emily often reflects on how hard things are for her husband and that maybe if she tried harder he could change. He could stay “good”. Emily still has hope that she can save him.

Today, when Emily called the hotline, something seemed different.  Emily said that the family had had a wonderful  Thanksgiving holiday at her in-laws' house and that the next morning the family went out to choose their Christmas tree. It was a good day.  Then things took a turn. After dinner that night, Emily said that her husband became enraged after looking at her social media account.  An old friend from high school had messaged her to say, “Happy Thanksgiving”.

When Emily spoke to our staff, she reported that her husband had pushed her and called her a “slut”.  She remembered him putting his hands around her neck and breaking her grandmother’s angel. It is at this point that Emily finds it difficult to describe what happened. Emily says, that for a brief moment when he had her hands around her neck, she thought she might die and all she could think about was the ornament.  “It’s so stupid.  It’s just an ornament, but it meant so much to my grandmother.” Emily went on to say that she knows her husband won’t change and that she no longer wants to believe the terrible things he says about her.

Emily will take her children away from the only home they have ever known, away from a father that they love to come to a shelter filled with strangers.  Emily and her girls will find safety, respect, and support.  Over the next few months, with counseling, we hope that they will come to know that the abuse was not their fault and that things can feel normal again.

We need your financial support to help make sure that these next few months go well for this family. 

2019, was a challenging time for Long Island not-for-profits.  The cost of doing business continues to climb, the need for services grows and government funding is not keeping pace. We anticipate another difficult year ahead and need you to make your year-end contribution today. Send your year-end donation before Friday the 30^th of December, I promise you that your gift will make a real impact in the life of individuals trying to escape an abusive relationship. Please help us keep these essential services available to individuals trapped in cruel and abusive relationships, by making a generous gift of $100.00 before December 30^th.

Together with our donors, we have done some powerful work in our community this year.

 

• • • • • • • • • Answered 2,628 hotline calls
                • Provided 5,939 advocacy services
                • Protected 244 individuals in our shelter
                • Provided 1,723 hours of counseling
                • Developed the first shelter of Long Island exclusively for survivors of domestic violence and their pets

 

                                                                                                                 Your donation supports these efforts.

Every tax-deductible donation helps to ensure no hotline call goes unanswered, no person or child needing shelter gets turned away and no client seeking support walks this path alone.

 

Be our hope this holiday season, support our services so we can support them.

$25.00       Provides prevention education to 30 students or community members

               $50.00       Provides 2 hours of crisis services through our 24-Hour Hotline

               $100.00     Provides dinner to our Safe Harbor Shelter residents for an entire  week

               $225.00     Provides 3 hours of legal services for our most vulnerable clients

               $500.00     Provides 6 hours for an advocate to attend court with a client    

              $1,000.00  Provides 3 months of counseling services for an entire family

 

On behalf of all of us here at LIADV, and those we serve, thank you.
May you have a peaceful and healthy holiday season and a hope-filled New Year!

 

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